timscience: (darwin)
[personal profile] timscience
Got a phone call from the Kirby service centre (if you've been reading this journal a while you may remember the Kirby from this post). They asked me if I was up for an ultra cheap Kirby service. I said thanks, but I had had one done recently, and it had turned out to be not so cheap as the parts weren't free and he spent an hour trying to sell us a new machine.

Anyway, it turns out that this guy had been the EVIL KIRBY FRANCHISE. It seems that some years back an evil man who everyone had trusted had killed the king and placed their incestuous son on the throne instead STOLEN THE DATABASE and sold it on to an evil company in Bristol who were not the real Kirby company. They had done this while the managing director of the good Kirby company was busy mourning the injury of his son who had mysteriously fallen from the roof at his mother's funeral. The man on the phone said the evil man was a sick sick person as opposed to the GOOD Kirby company who are loyal to the true heir.

The good Kirby company said that they were marching on King's Landing taking the evil Kirby company to trading standards and in the meantime would I like to declare them the King in the North take a service contract from them. I politely declined as I fear the intervention of a fireproof psychotic princess who can command dragons.
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May 2017

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